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Post by HateBMD on Oct 12, 2011 16:56:36 GMT -5
I have been with my fiance for 3 years now. He has a 5 year old son with his ex girlfriend. They broke up a year before we started dating. We have a 7 month old daughter together. Ever since she knew we were dating there has been ALOT of BMD!!!! First off she tried to get HIS parents to get them back together while i was pregnant. She has called CPS on us numerous times (all allegations were unfounded) She is trying to take his son away from him. She accuses him and threatens him. She took him to court a few months ago to get one day visitation. The judge denied and screwed her in the end. I am to pick up his son every other friday's from school and we keep him until Monday when i take him back to school (court order) I have asked her to lets be cool for the sake of their son. It was going good for a few weeks until she decided it wasnt going to happen. She wrote my fiance an email stating that i am not in this it should just be him and her and that i have no right. Yes, i am not his step mother yet BUT i take care of that kid when shes not around. She has also has broken a few court orders... She even took him out of state when my fiance told her no. I am just sick and tired of all this harassment. WHAT DO I DO!!!!!
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lark
New Member
Posts: 37
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Post by lark on Oct 12, 2011 21:07:12 GMT -5
hatebmd,
I can tell you from experience, document, document, document. Keep a diary and list dates and incidents for every time BM does something against the court order. It sounds like the judge already knows the deal when they denied BM 1 day visitation. Don't communicate with her, that's your fiance's job. She won't want to listen to anything you have to say and will possiblly try to use anything she can against you. I know it is hard, but never retaliate or bad mouth BM when the child is around you. I know this seems like tough advice, but i know from experience, there is light at the end of the tunnel.
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Post by hateBMD on Oct 13, 2011 18:09:24 GMT -5
Thank you sooo much for your input. I never talk bad about her especially in front of her son. Its not the kind of person i am. It is really hard to not talk to her because my fiance wont communicate with her and there are things we need to know about that my fiance really doesnt think about like i do ( i treat him as my own son)... like with school etc... and some of the stuff i have to communicate with her cause i pick him up and take him to school. She also has her son in therapy... he was fighting and hitting with kids at school and blaming us for it. i have been VERY patient with her. She would call the cops on us, call CPS. Its just getting super old and i have stopped myself from getting the cops involved cause its only hurting the kid. What example is she showing her son. especially getting the city involved. It really makes me wonder if she really is thinking about her son or herself.
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Post by thenewlywed on Oct 14, 2011 9:29:51 GMT -5
Trust me I understand, but a lot of times I stop and think why do we put ourselves through these kinds of things. I listen to you and sound like a nice person, and doesn't it suck that you have to deal with this stuff and all the drama simply because you fell in live with a man with a child. Why are we always expected to be the bigger people. All we wanted ( im sure) was your happily ever after with the man your with and maybe to be help to his child. But im sure nobody ever signs up for the drama..... its so unfair and I admire women like yourself and so many others who at times make the greater sacrafice of self to help in a situation that you really dont have to, and weak minded women and even sometimes the man you are with don't understand the kind of stregnth that takes. I SOLUTE YOU!
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