Post by mvinas on Jun 25, 2012 14:14:08 GMT -5
I've been with my boyfriend for about 10 months but we were dating for a long time before that. Once things became official it all started. First some background info: He was with her for about 4 months before she became pregnant and this was in Hawaii. He lived there n she was going to school there. After about a year after their daughter was born she wanted to move back to California where she's from and even though the relationship was already bad, he went with her to be with his daughter. He left his home, his friends, his family to go to somewhere where he didn't know anybody to be with someone who was already treating him badly just to be there for his child. So after the baby is about 1.5 they break up bc she cheats on him with several people and ends up staying with the most recent guy she cheated on him with, leaving him stuck in California with no family or friends (she didn't let him get a job bc she didn't want him to meet people). Luckily her brother and sister in law took him in and let him stay with them. Fast forward to our relationship, the moment it became public that we were together (Facebook), she started trying to stake a claim in him by excessively posting on his Facebook things like that. I got really close to her sister in law so she told me that th best thing to do is ignore bc any response would give her the satisfaction of knowing she got to me. Eventually it stopped but she started other things. She started to tell their daughter that she doesn't like me which she, who is now 4, tells me that her mom says this, but always follows with a "but I love you" which makes me sad bc her mother is teaching her such terrible things. I am just glad that this little girl is smart and strong willed enough to listen to her own mind. But recently she also told me her mother told her she doesn't have to listen to me only to her daddy. Which made for a confusing thing her dad had to explain to her. Bc unlike the mother we do not in any way want to bad mouth her mother or even her mother's new boyfriend (someone new) bc we don't want to send a bad message. Again we're glad she's smart enough to know when something makes sense but It makes me angry to know her mother would put her own selfishness before the safety of her daughter. Bc when it comes down to it it's a safety issue. What if she (who we found out just recently is allergic to pistachios) wants to do something that could be dangerous and what if I am the only one around at that moment and she decides to listen to her mom and not listen to me and she gets hurt? The thing about it is she let's her daughter hang out with her boyfriend when she is not around (he has a child of his own) and my boyfriend is ok with it. He's met him and he's nice and as long as he treats his daughter well he doesn't see a problem. But the baby mama is a hypocrite and doesn't want me around her daughter. My boyfriend is seeking legal advice bc the BM is trying to lessen the days he gets to see her. They have no legal custody hashed out or anything. I could care less how she feels about me. What hurts me is the strain it puts on him and the terrible lessons she's teaching her daughter. Shes selfish, mean, and her own family has called her a compulsive liar. She spins stories to people telling people that my boyfriend is a cheating, wife beating, drug addict. But when it comes down to it, if a custody battle happens, her own brother, sister in law and MOTHER would side with my boyfriend and want him to have full custody. If that doesn't tell you something about her I don't know what will!