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Post by Anonymous on Nov 21, 2013 12:55:56 GMT -5
I don't know how to handle the BM anymore. It's coming to the point where I second guess if I even want to be in a relationship with my boyfriend. we've been together almost a year now and I have never even met his daughter. I knew about this baggage going into the relationship but never thought it would be so stressful. BM is still in love with him and refuses to move on. She calls him texts him all day everyday. she harrasses him threatens him nonstop. she holds the child over his head. I can't even like anything on his fb because she will freak out and tell him if he doesn't delete me on fb he can't see his daughter. he tells her he doesn't have a gf bc if not she will not only hold the baby over his head but his entire families. When she first found out about me she sent me death threats harassed me tortured me until I finally blocked her. she tells him if he moves on from her then his daughter will as well. He knows it bothers me but I don't know how to talk to him about it or what to say or how to handle it bc he is so stressed over it. He doesn't want to go to court but this girl is never going to stop. What do I do:( help!!
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Post by Deleted on Nov 21, 2013 13:49:43 GMT -5
Well...if you want REAL advice, no sugar coating-then I say LEAVE NOW! I know love is hard to let go and its hard to get out of a circle youve been going in for a year now but unless you like this mess-JUST LEAVE! He clearly doesnt have a hold on his situation and you dont need to be a part of something that messy. That just sounds HORRIBLE and reality is, IT PROBABLY will only get worse. He doesnt sound like he knows how to take control of HIS life by what youve discribed his actions are, so why waste your time? NOPE! Get up your self esteem and GO RUNNING! FAST!
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Post by jaylady999 on Nov 21, 2013 20:14:47 GMT -5
Absolutely.
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Post by Deleted on Nov 21, 2013 21:51:21 GMT -5
exactly....I cant see being with a man who allows another woman too have that much control over him. yuck!
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Post by truthbtold on Nov 24, 2013 20:27:15 GMT -5
Yup to what everyone else has said...........MOVE ALONG. At the risk of sounding like a broken record, but it needs to be said again, if you are child-free, please seek a man that is also child-free. I would say that this is a gentle warning.
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Post by Kelsey on Dec 8, 2013 19:07:48 GMT -5
Thanks everyone for your posts and advice . And in response he lives at his own place I do not live with him. He usually sees his daughter as his moms or his house. He doesn't go over the BMs house. I'm still debating on leaving him. He has no control over the situation and lets her control his entire life. extremely stressful. He tells her anything she wants to hear just to please her. hopefully things start to look up, if not I am going to leave him and it's really sad because this guy will never live a normal life. He loves his daughter more than anything in the world and can barely see her because the BM controls everything. Hopefully he will go to court. And if there is anyone else out there reading this that is new in a relationship with someone who has an obsessive BM and the situation is outta control my advice is to stay away. The drama and stress is truly not worth it and it's harder to get out later on than in the beginning
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