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Post by wbmama on Apr 16, 2008 17:40:27 GMT -5
Not but a couple of days ago, I mentioned that our BM was doing the "ignore you" trick. Knew it was too good to last. She called DH today raising h*ll! She's going to sue, she's called the police, she's not going to communicate with him about the child, its all my fault, blah, blah, blah.
The interesting thing about her phone call was not anything she said....it was my reaction. I thought it was funny in a way. I brushed it off. Which is something I've rarely been able to do. I usually steam for a while. Not this time. I honestly think its you guys - this board - my safe place. I think I'm getting it. I had a light bulb moment. WOW.
She'll keep pushing buttons - I'll see how long I can stay calm .
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Post by wbmama on Apr 17, 2008 4:28:34 GMT -5
Well, she called back apologizing to him. And in the process told him how "evil" I was. Someone got into one of her online accounts and she's blaming me. I think its funny. The last contact I had with her was when I called to invite SS to his brother's birthday party (she wouldn't answer the phone or return my call) and the time before that was when I visited SS in the hospital. Evil Evil Stepmother I am! This is why I think we need a break. And you know the sad thing about it - the other kids have stopped asking about SS. They just assume he's not coming over 'cause his mom won't let them. SS loves his brothers and s/sister. She's the one standing in her own child's way of getting to know his family. We had a family event - all of the aunts, uncles, grandparents were there - my SS cried (4 years old) the entire time because he was in a room full of strangers. Not any fault of my DH - most every time we get him we take him to visit them. I think in the crazy world of BMD - sometimes you have to separated yourself from the situation for a while. I know we're fighting a loosing battle. No matter what we do, how kind we are, how hard we push to do the right thing - she will always resist us.  Her hate for me and love for my DH will ALWAYS over power her choices for her son. |
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Post by lovejones08 on Apr 17, 2008 12:09:31 GMT -5
The wonderful about our situation wbmama is that we don't have to fight the battle so when you're not fighting there is nothing too loose any the person will be fighting themselves. Choose you battle wisely and ask yourself is BM worth the sake of me having a good day? I'll answer for you HELL NAW!!! At times you may get pissed, you're human but as long as it only lasts for a moment and you don't harp on it. The second wonderful thing about the situatiion is that children grow up to be adults and adopt their on opinions based on what they conceptualize and BM will find that her actions will either make her child resent her or make him an angry person neither one is good. You just keep being positive and supporting DH and SS will figure out the rest for himself.
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Post by downazzchick on Apr 17, 2008 13:26:27 GMT -5
Wbmama, I'm proud of you girl for not letting the situation get to you! Your definately growing! It is really sad that whatever happened to her account has happened. I know I don't want anything to happen to my change! I just wonder Y she suspects you had anything to do with it? I hope that whatever the problem is she will be able to work out her problems because I'm sure your SS is missing out on getting to know a great SM and Father too!
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Post by wbmama on Apr 18, 2008 8:26:34 GMT -5
she blames me for EVERYTHING! The account was not a bank account and all she's said was that NOTHING was done except for the password was changed...she probably did it and forgot about it.
She just looks for things to call my DH and blame me. She really wants me to look like the problem.
It doesn't bother me anymore - I've tried so hard to have a positive relationship with her.
My DH is refusing to talk to her. She's always making threats - calling names - causing problems - etc. This poor man has dealt with this craziness for 5 years - its only gotten worse.
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