|
|
Post by wbmama on Apr 28, 2008 7:52:41 GMT -5
Off the wall comments? From me?
Why does everyone seem to think I want a board full of fluff and sunshine?
Let me clarify myself....
If you want to argue - knock yourself out.
A healthy debate with constructive criticism is what this board needs.
|
|
|
|
Post by BADCHICK on Apr 28, 2008 12:28:46 GMT -5
Cloudy I agree with you on many levels. It has worked in me and my hubby's relationship. With dear sis, her BD is full of BS. And I believe it's intentional to cause my sister emotional distress. My hubby and I both advised her to steer clear of him. She doesn't try to pull rank she just insists on being respected and her child being respected. My opinion is if as a BM or wifey you feel personally disrespected cut contact. Why let that pot continue to boil sooner or later it'll spill over. My hubby's BM is just a witch. She a gorgeous girl has plenty of male friends just the type that wants to get all she can get from whoever she can get it from. It irritates me. Also, Keia1 doesn't need to get a real relationship she needs to continue to vent or seek counseling to get over her issues first. Then seek a new relationship.
|
|
|
|
Post by lovejones08 on Apr 28, 2008 14:46:38 GMT -5
Cloudy,
As I have mentioned to you in another post that we have similar situations at this point, but mine was a little while coming but still BS; however, maybe your DHs BM is a little more mature than mine because if SD loves me and wants to call me by my nickname she has a fit with her daughter and tells her to call me by my first name I am not her mother..LOL she is slap knee funny and really I'm just too busy to give her satisfation and attention by even acknowledging her, but from your post before the one responding to me. I can see where your opinions on certain matters stem from because of your past situation with dad/mom/stepmom.
Concerning when I said that people should not be diagnosing other people situations because I have not seen anyone posting themselves as a psychologist in marriage in the family so all of the big talking and advice giving can get offensive depending on how the person was coming across about their opinion because like you have said it that's all it is- an opinion not necessarily a fact that someone must take heed to. Quite frankly I was tired of reading all of the cattiness before I got to a post that was discussing something worth reading and responding to, so that is what I was saying. Let's get back to the topic at hand.
There are different situations for this topic definitely. Some people (like me) don't interfere, don't cause problems, try to be pleasant, wonderful to the child, and still I had hell on earth with her as regardless of what i did. And honestly I got tired of trying to prove myself worthy because I was already worthy just by being with DH. She just didn't like me for her own peronally reason she just chose not to like me because of her jealousy and her unwillingness to except the fact the DH had move on and was happy without her.
My dad remarried and it was hard for my stepmother to adjust and so we didn't get along to well at first, but as an adult I can now empathize with how she felt; however, I disagree about the way she went about handling her feelings because I was an innocent child. I'm a daddy's girl, so I take true offense to woman who make hell on earth for men who are trying to be father's to their children because depsite what happened in a relationship none of that matters anymore and now it should be about the child and unfortunately it hardly is about the child and in the end they grow up with resentment, confusion, anger, hurt. And this can stem from BM/DH/SM(stepmom)/SD(stepdad), Grandparents, and whoever else is involved. I was just curious about your reason for seeking this site. Appreciate the clarification.
|
|
|
|
Post by lovejones08 on Apr 28, 2008 15:07:51 GMT -5
wbmama, you did not understand me correctly. I was responding to an earlier response when you said something about this is a place learn and that this bord should be peaceful because we deal with the BMs outside of this, I do agree that the arguing back n forth was getting a bit old and should be kept between personal messages as opposed to trying to get the last word on the message board, but I was relaying to you that the drama hear with other people may be a part of the growing process (practice) when dealing with BMD. I was not saying that you were saying outlandish things. I was stating that why even bother responding to the post that appear to be outlandish in anyones personal opinion just weed through the other stuff and find what you came her for. that's all I was saying.. No, attack on you hun that's not my style.
|
|
|
|
Post by wbmama on Apr 28, 2008 15:28:39 GMT -5
gotcha (wink!)
Thanks for making that clear.
|
|
