Using Children As Targets / Bait

[bishbgone]

Hi All:

I'm brand new & found this site by way of Google. Thank God for Google, it is our friend.

I have a few questions but I'll start out w/ one in particular. If a man is concerned that the mother of his young child/children may take out her anger and frustrations on their children if she were to learn about his new or current relationship with another woman, would it be ideal for him to notify the proper authorities of such? What if he hasn't seen the mother of his children OR his children in 8-9 mos? And doesn't have any knowledge of their whereabouts because the mother chooses not to inform him of this information and the only contact is via Facebook or via phone when the mother's phone isn't disconnected.

Is that giving the BM too much control? Leading her to think that the kid's father is not in a relationship and that she may have a chance in getting back with him? If the BM suspects a relationship with another woman does she have the right to contact the other women and question her if she's never met or had a conversation with the woman? Does she have the right to question him and his personal life and/or relationships?

Thoughts & feedback would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks

[blaquechinadoll]

BBG... Really, both BM & BD are out of order. Realistically, does this man think that b/c he has a child by a woman that he is no longer with, he can't go on an lead a life with someone else? So, how long does he plan on playing THAT game? Until the child is 18? First of all, if he hasn't seen the kids in 8 months, how does he even know that they are ok? Secondly, as with anything else that has been taken from you, you get the right folks involved and get it back. He can get visitation rights to his children. They deserve to have both parents and a parent have the right to be in their child's life. THE END Now, as far as it goes with the personal questions of him: As lo g as he is not involved in criminal activities or hang around suspect individuals, then NO it's none of her business... even that is none of her business, if the children aren't even around him. All she needs to be concerned about is the welfare and environment of their children when they are with him.. As for you, there needs to be no questions, unless again, it's about the children and you interacting. What man in his right mind would allow a woman to have his children if he feels like they might be in harms way? I'd get her on tape, video or letter stating such and report her. Let her explain to the child protection services or the police, why she would even make such a threat or act in such a way as to harm the children... And me personally, I will let anyone know EXACTLY what I want them to know. I have been in a relationship with my husband off and on for 7 years, before getting married. We've been married 3. So, she has had 10 years to digest my presence. Did I try to communicate and be amicable? Yes. Did she try? No. So from that day on, to hell with her. She has tried to communicate with me thru their oldest daughter, I give no response. SD talked about her mother kinda bad, but jokingly one day... I continued to ignore the whole fishing expedition. So, rethink about what type of man you need in your life. My hubby was not one for confrontation and tried to "shield" us from each other, but I wear big gurl panties and don't need another daddy. I demanded that he MAN up and stop getting played emotionally. I stood by him, but I can admit, it came to a point where I let him go... a couple of times. I had to let him see for himself that: Just because I don't like her, doesn't mean that the things I pointed out to him were jaded. HE was jaded. He learned for himself, truly because he valued our friendship and our relationship. He eventually saw that she was a bible-toting liar. So, talk to him and try to get him to see what REALLY makes sense... We all deserve to be happy, but happiness starts within. Good Luck!