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Post by nicole r on Sept 20, 2010 14:46:57 GMT -5
So my boyfriend/bd also has 2 other kids. The youngest is 5 months older than my son with him. Yes we were prego at the same time. Anyways, he is with me & says he wants me & not her. Anyways he was not close with them until recently he has trying to be around them. So when he goes with them his baby mama has to go along too. Since she is breast feeding (baby is 10 months old & also eats solids) so its not like he will starve if she is not around for a few hours that he is with them. So a few weeks ago they all go to the zoo & yesterday to chuckie cheese. Am I wrong for being upset that she is also around & enjoying the day with him?!!?!? I get sooo upset cause she goes too, cant he just spend the day with them alone??
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Post by jaylady999 on Sept 20, 2010 15:13:04 GMT -5
Hmmm, thats a toughy. First off as a BM who let her son go with BD for full weekends with pumped breastmilk, him taking his child for a few hours should be no problem even if she breastfeeds, especially if he's on solid foods.
But other than that, have you told him how you felt about it?
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Post by blessedmama83 on Sept 20, 2010 17:42:35 GMT -5
So my boyfriend/bd also has 2 other kids. The youngest is 5 months older than my son with him. Yes we were prego at the same time. Anyways, he is with me & says he wants me & not her. Anyways he was not close with them until recently he has trying to be around them. So when he goes with them his baby mama has to go along too. Since she is breast feeding (baby is 10 months old & also eats solids) so its not like he will starve if she is not around for a few hours that he is with them. So a few weeks ago they all go to the zoo & yesterday to chuckie cheese. Am I wrong for being upset that she is also around & enjoying the day with him?!!?!? I get sooo upset cause she goes too, cant he just spend the day with them alone?? |
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Post by appleblossom on Sept 22, 2010 0:47:02 GMT -5
So my boyfriend/bd also has 2 other kids. The youngest is 5 months older than my son with him. Yes we were prego at the same time. Anyways, he is with me & says he wants me & not her. Anyways he was not close with them until recently he has trying to be around them. So when he goes with them his baby mama has to go along too. Since she is breast feeding (baby is 10 months old & also eats solids) so its not like he will starve if she is not around for a few hours that he is with them. So a few weeks ago they all go to the zoo & yesterday to chuckie cheese. Am I wrong for being upset that she is also around & enjoying the day with him?!!?!? I get sooo upset cause she goes too, cant he just spend the day with them alone?? Nicole, I don't believe in crying over spilled milk so I won't go on about what you should have done to avoid all this mess. You've made the decision to stay with your boyfriend, so now I understand you are trying to make the best of it. Your boyfriend tells you he wants you and not her. Make sure he SHOWS you with his ACTIONS. Watch him closely. He will show you if he really loves you. You say he was not close to them (kids) and has just recently started trying to be around them. I sense just a tiny bit of possessiveness towards your boyfriend and his time. Correct me if I'm wrong. I'm sure there is a part of you that wishes he didn't have to spend time with his other kids so he could be 100% devoted to you. Thus the question about whether or not you are wrong for being upset that she (BM) is around and enjoying the day with YOUR man. Again, correct me if I'm wrong. If it really bothers you that much, and it sounds like it does, tell your boyfriend how you feel. If he chooses to set boundaries with his BM in order to make you feel more secure, then his ACTIONS are showing you that he cares. If he chooses to do nothing and lets this go on (knowing how it makes you feel) then YOU have tough choices to make. Either way, you have to take care of yourself first. Cuz if the roles were reversed, do you really think your boyfriend would tolerate you disregarding his concerns and put up with you disrespecting him? You would be out the door so quick your head would spin. Just something to think about.  |
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