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Post by angelnmo on May 11, 2008 1:19:55 GMT -5
Ladies, what's your BMs stories? Mine has a mother that made the exact same mistakes that she did.
Her mom dated a man that later decided to leave her, only to find out that she was pregnant. Thought the baby would keep him. It didn't. He left anyway and had nothing to do with the child except on a financial level. The mother dragged behind this man for years, and to this day, still doesn't have a man or husband (she is in her 60s).
Now daughter grew up to be just like mother. Meets man, gets pregnant on purpose to make him marry her, he leaves anyway and to this day she still drags behind him. You would think that the daughter would have learned from her mother's mistakes. Or that the mother would have raised her daughter with more pride than that!
I hope the cycle ends and this woman's daughter doesn't end up just like grandma and mommy!
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Post by destini1969 on May 11, 2008 1:28:48 GMT -5
Interesting that you mention this, because my DH and I were speaking about this topic earlier this evening. Interesting to add my DHs BM and her mother share the same story as well.
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Post by just2beme on May 11, 2008 12:30:42 GMT -5
BM grew up in a home with her biological mom & dad. She is the the youngest kid and is used to getting what she wants. She wanted my DH. She has not been able to get him so she throws temper tantrums  . |
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Post by memyslfni on May 11, 2008 13:02:57 GMT -5
Interesting to see that it is a pattern. Anglnmo ur bm and my bm share the same pattern. Does your bm have daughter(s)? Do you see this pattern reflecting on them as well? My bm has girls and this is why I push for bf to get time with them. They may still have a chance to live decent lives and not feel like they have to follow behind a man/boy...Im starting to realize that we cant save everyone..  |
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Post by angelnmo on May 11, 2008 13:08:52 GMT -5
Fortunately, the BM in my life has 1 girl that is under 3 years old. There is still time for a good strong womans guidance to lead her down the right path. It would be a wonderful thing to break this vicious cycle. I don't want to ever have to watch the heartache my husband would endure by watching his precious baby girl running behind a man that doesn't want her or doesn't deserve her affections. Or worse, try to trap a man by getting pregnant.
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Post by lovejones08 on May 13, 2008 1:27:46 GMT -5
That is why we are very important in this situation with are DHs. We have to set a positive, productive, mature, and proactive example for DHs children (especially the young girls) because they will get old enough to decipher truth from deception and wrong from right. They will have something else to look up to if their mothers are setting negative examples.
Fathers are so, so, so important in their children's lives boys and girls. I don't care what woman say. A man is supposed to teach his son how to be a respectful man so he won't go seeking negative guidance from the streets and teach his daughter what type of man to seek (one that will take good care of her and look out for her best interest) as well as keeping her from seeking fatherly love from an intimate relationship.
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Post by destini1969 on May 13, 2008 11:32:39 GMT -5
That was very well said lovejones08. As single mothers we are able to raise our child(ren) alone, but it soooooo difficult to give our child(ren) that other piece they're missing from daddy!
We have allowed that Womens Liberation crap go to our head. H*ll, I NEED my man and I am not too proud to make it known!
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Post by ybother on May 14, 2008 12:34:44 GMT -5
According to my DH, BM has a 14 year old daughter from previous relationship, although the 14 years dad is in her life according to him, she was a nutcase with him too. my DH and the guy were on cool speaking terms and from what he told my DH she is a nut who goes on temper tantrums, lit his clothes on fire, fight with him in the street.. She is a looney, this women jumped on top of the hood of my DH car when she was 6months pregnant when he tried to leave the house to avoid a fight.. My DH tells me that several times, the BM 14 year old daughter would cry and yell at her mother for making these ridiculous wild scenes and would threaten her to go move in with her father.. Obviously this women is not well mentally and I hope the cycle is broken because at least her daughter and my DH son can see that this is not the way a women should behave... from my understanding the BM mother is a widow but the BM father had kids from different women.. who knows I hate to judge people
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Post by downazzchick on May 15, 2008 22:06:02 GMT -5
Interesting that you mention this, because my DH and I were speaking about this topic earlier this evening. Interesting to add my DHs BM and her mother share the same story as well. Same here. DH and I were discussing how BM and her mother are very much the same and have the same relationships. BM mother has never loved herself or anyone else enough to share any love with another individual. BM does not show love to any of her kids and she hates me because I have a genuine interest in her child. I hope SD does not grow up to have this hatred in her heart. Oh and BM moma hate me too! |
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