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Post by sbimiss on Jul 12, 2008 15:04:07 GMT -5
This is a very interesting question. I have actually thought of this many times regarding my bf. We speak of having children of our own and plan to soon after we marry. I always wonder if he would be able to share the responsibility as I would expect him to in caring and raising our child/children. He has always played a fatherly role to both of his children (each from a different mother) in my opinion as we all know this can be difficult to do when raising kids in separate households. Going to daddy's can be like a vacation and he has been taking them for his visitation ever since they were born. Though each pregnancy was a result of a few careless sexual encounters with no relationship following, I have always witnessed him to be a great disciplinary role with both children ever since they were very young when he had them in his care. I do however think that because they are both girls, he sees difficulty in typical things that a mother would normally do i.e. cooking, cleaning, bathing, dressing, combing hair ect. Thankfully, he has always had help from his mother, nieces, and myself since his children were born. When his children are with us, I am pretty much the main caretaker. I def. seek help from him when it comes to disciplining. Generally speaking, I don't like to think that people should depend on others to get by but, I do believe that he would not be able to make it without my help. Then again, I have seen wonders from people who have been put to the test. When you really have to do something by force.....you'll do it in the best way you know how. So, I am not underestimating. lol Anything is possible. I am very fortunate to believe that when we have children together, because this will be his first time having children in a relationship and raising them in a relationship, he will take an active role in everything.
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Post by angelnmo on Jul 12, 2008 22:06:15 GMT -5
I believe my DH2b could. I encouraged him to change diapers, comb hair, bathe, feed, etc. so that he would not miss out on these "firsts" with his baby girl. He has had so much practice that he actually can comb hair and change diapers better than I can!!
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Post by memyslfni on Jul 13, 2008 14:03:08 GMT -5
Its funny that you say should bring up this topic because My dh is the same way when he gets involved in something thats has his utmost attention he tends to tune the children out and who knows what'll happen when mommas gone. Also what you mentioned about your SD, This is so true. I think thats one of the reasons that his kids dont come around like that because he doesnt want to put the burden on me. Cuz Lord knows I go crazy with the kids we already got...! Ooh thats too much! LOL
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Post by gemmani on Jul 14, 2008 11:17:10 GMT -5
Hmmm, well, he was doing everything for them before I was around. He still does, because I had refused to get caught up in that whole "let me be mommy" mentality. I still do. He's a great dad, very attentive. But again, he also has that trait where he"ll give them a movie or something to keep them busy so he can do what he wants. Guys have it easier than women when it comes to detaching temporarily. On a daily basis? I don't know. By himself? I don't know. He's do it, b/c he takes his responsibility seriously. That what he wants and all, but I'm not totally convinced that he has the patience for it. But I do know that he'd step to the plate and take care of his responsibility. He would probably ask for my opinions 40x more than he does now. If they were to live with us though, I'd definitely be more involved in the actual "raising" of the kids. But to answer the question, yeah. He'd be able to handle it.
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Post by jaylady999 on Jul 17, 2008 17:19:30 GMT -5
I can say with no uncertainty that my BD could definately raise our son without my help. He is an excellent father and I am so proud to be able to say that. My son goes to live with his father each summer and I dont worry one bit about our son. I give them their bonding time, so I dont call our son everday. We talk maybe once a week while he is gone with his father. So yeah he would do a hellava job as a full time single father
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