Post by gemmani on Jul 28, 2008 11:52:13 GMT -5
So......here's an update to my thread "Conflicted" or "Confusion" or something like that.
My fiance went and had a talk with the oldest skid (6 years old).
Fiance: You remember Gemmani and I are getting married, right?
Skid: Yes. And mommy said that if you get married, she will be very, very angry.
Fiance: Well, getting married makes us happy. I'm sorry your mommy doesn't like it, but it doesn't have anything to do with her.
Skid: Okay. You're gonna marry Gemmani b/c you love her and she loves you, right?
Fiance: That's right. Would you like to be in the wedding? You'd be a flower girl and wear a pretty dress.
Skid: Yeah!..........Daddy, mommy is a very mean person.
Of course, there were many details omitted, but that's the basic conversation.
After their talk, she came to me and we painted our nails while she talked up a STORM. She was saying how she's not supposed to tell me stuff or hug me or anything b/c her mommy doesn't like me. She said she doesn't know why she doesn't like me b/c I'm so nice and I don't say bad stuff about her. Then she goes on to say how excited she is for the wedding, and how she's gonna be happy for it, even though her mommy doesn't like it.
I was speechless, for the most part, because I was kind of upset before when I had asked her about the wedding and her response to it. But I'm guessing she just needed to hear it from her dad, which is understandable. The youngest 2 skids had been asleep during this exchange, but when they awoke right away she started teaching them how to walk down the aisle and telling them about their roles in the wedding.
I'm glad she doesn't seem as conflicted about the whole event:)
I'm glad fiance finally talked to her.
However, BM was complaining to fiance (voice mail) that he doesn't appreciate everything she has done for him. She gave him 3 kids. They were together almost 7 years. She gave him a family and instead he moves on. And now it isn't fair that she's a single mother. Well now...........
Didn't she think of that when she was trying to trap him with pregnancy? Don't they use their brains? If I do A, then B might happen, or if that doesn't work, then C is going to happen. She didn't think of that when she decided to pop out kids without a real commitment? How do you start complaining now? That's what you signed up for when you start dropping out kids with no ring on your d**ned finger, trying to keep a man around. If they actually stopped to think, maybe they wouldn't be in the position they are in now.
I SINCERELY HOPE that BM doesn't give them a hard time about being excited. I hope that whatever she has to say, she says it to Fiance, and not the kids. I mean, really now. A grown woman putting her personal problems on a six year old.
But I'm THRILLED they want to be there!!
My fiance went and had a talk with the oldest skid (6 years old).
Fiance: You remember Gemmani and I are getting married, right?
Skid: Yes. And mommy said that if you get married, she will be very, very angry.
Fiance: Well, getting married makes us happy. I'm sorry your mommy doesn't like it, but it doesn't have anything to do with her.
Skid: Okay. You're gonna marry Gemmani b/c you love her and she loves you, right?
Fiance: That's right. Would you like to be in the wedding? You'd be a flower girl and wear a pretty dress.
Skid: Yeah!..........Daddy, mommy is a very mean person.
Of course, there were many details omitted, but that's the basic conversation.
After their talk, she came to me and we painted our nails while she talked up a STORM. She was saying how she's not supposed to tell me stuff or hug me or anything b/c her mommy doesn't like me. She said she doesn't know why she doesn't like me b/c I'm so nice and I don't say bad stuff about her. Then she goes on to say how excited she is for the wedding, and how she's gonna be happy for it, even though her mommy doesn't like it.
I was speechless, for the most part, because I was kind of upset before when I had asked her about the wedding and her response to it. But I'm guessing she just needed to hear it from her dad, which is understandable. The youngest 2 skids had been asleep during this exchange, but when they awoke right away she started teaching them how to walk down the aisle and telling them about their roles in the wedding.
I'm glad she doesn't seem as conflicted about the whole event:)
I'm glad fiance finally talked to her.
However, BM was complaining to fiance (voice mail) that he doesn't appreciate everything she has done for him. She gave him 3 kids. They were together almost 7 years. She gave him a family and instead he moves on. And now it isn't fair that she's a single mother. Well now...........
Didn't she think of that when she was trying to trap him with pregnancy? Don't they use their brains? If I do A, then B might happen, or if that doesn't work, then C is going to happen. She didn't think of that when she decided to pop out kids without a real commitment? How do you start complaining now? That's what you signed up for when you start dropping out kids with no ring on your d**ned finger, trying to keep a man around. If they actually stopped to think, maybe they wouldn't be in the position they are in now.
I SINCERELY HOPE that BM doesn't give them a hard time about being excited. I hope that whatever she has to say, she says it to Fiance, and not the kids. I mean, really now. A grown woman putting her personal problems on a six year old.
But I'm THRILLED they want to be there!!
in my case though, we didnt tell his children until right when we were buying her dress and getting his tux, so about a month before. so i think we just cut out a lot of drama that way as well as threw her off about the date or timeframe of our wedding. I am so glad though, that you got that out of the way and the kids are happy. Thats what its all about. When is your wedding by the way?
its ashame we have to go through these measures, but these BM's need to know the weddings will go on whether they approve or not! LOL. 
and ;D 
