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Post by mydadview on Apr 20, 2008 10:10:42 GMT -5
my wife left pc up 1 day and i saw website. i read thru and think i know who she is. my side is this. i love my wife and our family. i also love my other kid. it used to hurt whn i cant see my child. i dont like to talk about my child or game the mom plays. i see it games though but it is easier to ignore it. i dont want to fight. it would be different if my wife took off with our kids. i have been in our kids life since before they were born. i cant imagine life withour our kids. it may sound bad but i am used to not seeing my other kid. the mom has kept my kid away so much i dont know what it is to see her. im grateful what time i do see her. my wife gets upset when kids mom does something. im used to it. i just dont pay kids mom no more attention. i put up with her for sake of our kid. that is why i dont contact her much. i have to go through mom to talk to my kid. my kid is like a stranger to me now but i do love my kid. wife pushes me to talk to my kid. it is easier this way. wife gets mad because kids mom says or does something she thinks is disrespectful. i wish she would not get mad. i know what my ex trying to do. to be honest i get an ego boost to no i still got it. i no that sounds bad. but i would not act on it i would not touch her if she were the last girl on earth. she is to crazy. i didnt no that before we had a kid but i know it now. so wife you dont have to get mad everytime she does something. i expect it from her. i love you and our family. ex dont got nothing on you.
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Post by nomoredrama on Apr 20, 2008 12:49:57 GMT -5
Ooh, ooh...and, aaahhh. That was sweet??!!...I think...
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Post by nomoredrama on Apr 20, 2008 12:51:53 GMT -5
Wait...you aren't my DH are you??  I know he's not mine because he is deployed. Whew!!  |
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Post by jusdntundstn on Apr 20, 2008 13:00:26 GMT -5
Oooh somebody in trouble...but in my opionion its best that if a CBM is involved to cut contact, even if it means child included. Kids dont need to see all the negativity between their parents, so until the other adult chooses to wise up and be a parent (not a pain in the a$$) cut'em off. As bad as it sounds, I've found this to be the best CBM medicine. I've tried to tell my man this but it goes in one ear and out the other. Its not about the money, but making your life as miserable as possible. Oh and u my friend should be ashamed talkin about u get a rise out of knowing u still got it! Question: (Since youve found ur way to this site...) Does it make you feel great that ur woman gets soo angry (showing how much she cares) or that your x continues to chase after you? Answer at your own risk...!
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Post by wbmama on Apr 20, 2008 14:25:53 GMT -5
I don't really know what to say - glad to get a new perspective
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Post by junieb2 on Apr 20, 2008 19:31:55 GMT -5
Thank you for your honesty, BUT... Did you ever think that not drawing clear lines with your ex is perceived by your wife as not your current family first? Have you told your wife that your "ex dont got nothing on you (her)". She deserves to have that reassurance each time your ex interferes with her day-to-day activities. It is the DH's JOB and RESPONSIBILITY to offer reassurance to the wife.
Again, thank you for your honesty and "shame on you" for even entertaining your ego with something so sensitive as this.
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Post by downazzchick on Apr 20, 2008 21:25:58 GMT -5
Thanks for giving a POV from the DH/BD.
Okay look who's hubby is this.... I gotta know.!
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Post by jusdntundstn on Apr 21, 2008 10:55:19 GMT -5
For real, fess up ladies...
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Post by lovejones08 on Apr 21, 2008 13:45:08 GMT -5
well it's not mine, but mydadview junieb2 is correct. Although it doesn't bother you and yes it is so very easy to say that shouldn't bother your wife, but quite frankly it is easier said than done. Women go through a whole lot more emotions when it concerns our men and another woman. Men can just shrug it off and say oh well, but you may want to make sure that your shrug it off attitude is not viewed incorrectly by your wife. That is where verbal communication comes in. I know men are nonverbal individuals but sometimes to have to speak to make sure that your point is being taken clearly. Thanks for sharing your thoughts here because I'm sure many of our men feel the same way that you do, but it needs to be said 2 more than this website. Obviously you have pinpointed an issue because you found this website and you suspect your wife to be on here. So what are you going to do as the husband. I can't just give up and sweep the dog sh*t under the rug because i guess what it will still stink like hell and cause problems. I'm sure you wish you were never in this crazy situation but never give up on your child regardless. Sometimes you may not know what to do and you feel like you're a rock in a hard place, but expressing yourself may help. For example, BM does something, wife gets upset, instead of arguing about why she is upset or just appearing to ignore it; grab her give her a kiss and tell her that you apologize that she has to experience the consequences of your past, but you love and appreciate her for hanging in there with you. Give her some incentives to hanging in there with you it will make a world of a difference.
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Post by junieb2 on Apr 22, 2008 18:05:27 GMT -5
It's not my husband...I don't think so anyway. Well said lovejones08; very well put. |
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Post by wbmama on Apr 22, 2008 18:17:31 GMT -5
not mine either! I knew it couldn't be when I read the part about him getting a ego boost!
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