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Post by truthbtold on Aug 26, 2013 17:14:15 GMT -5
okay....if you women who are so baby mama drama free, then why come to this forum only to DOWN GRADE these women (who are lost in their situations) with your smart allic remarks? Move along with all that! Just bc you have been on this site for YEARS on end with nothing better to do, And are tired of reading the same BABY MAMA DRAMA doesn’t mean you need to comment with your rude and negative remarks, period. Actually, years ago, this site was about way more than dogging out BMs. We shared a lot of active ideas and we helped one another through some tough times. There were women here who had built friendships in other areas on the web(FB, etc) and we still keep in contact. It was not at all a b*tch session about how ignorant BMs are. We actually offered healthy advice for ourselves as SMs. In other words, at the end of the day, it was our goal to not focus on BM and focus on ourselves and on the men who we are in relationships with.
Lately though, it seems as if those who come here to post their issues don't want solutions, they just want a place to gripe their moans and groans because clearly their man isn't listening. If you arent here to help people with an open hand and kind words than get a life outside of this site. Yeah, kind words, hand holding, kumbaya. Miss me with that. Be a grown woman and put your big girl panties on and instead of taking offense, read the words that are being written. Or continue on letting the BM in your(general you) life make your miserable.
You silly b*tches are a joke. This is probably the ONLY place you can come and feel as if you are superior to anyone and the only reason you feel that way is bc you have YEARS of practice with this mess. BABY MAMA DRAMA is CLEARLY an issue in your life or at least a high concern bc JAYLADY, I know you FOR SURE have been on this site FOR AT LEAST A DECADE, if it doesn’t matter or concern you find a BETTER HOBBY! LMAOOOOO LOL, feel better now? Great. First of all, I ended up on this site trying to get material for a book I was writing years ago. However, I met some wonderful ladies back then and became online friends with them and the rest is history. BM is not an issue in my life. But she was way back when. Even before I found this site. She is not now and hasn't been for a good 8 or 9 years. Why? Because I stopped allowing her to be my problem. You should probably try it. Or would you rather try to take shots at me because it makes you feel better?
My skin is some of the thickest you'll ever find, so I sincerely hope you don't think you are getting under it. You're not. Not that serious. Either way, when you get done with your temper tantrum, you will log off and still have BM issues. You are not here looking for solid advice. You are looking for someone to coddle your boo boo of an insane BM. Good luck with that!!! ;D
By the way, I have been in this forum since about 2008 or so. So it is impossible for you to know for sure (as you say) that I've been here for at least a decade. I haven't.
But even if I had...so what? You don't have to explain yourself Sis, but I do understand that knowledge is power ;D. Unfortunately, this person is NOT receptive to it. *dead* @ underlined. Ha, ha, ha. |
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Post by jaylady999 on Aug 26, 2013 17:45:59 GMT -5
As I SMH, it is coming to light why so many have issues with BMD. Some of this BS is guided by insecure type new GFs and wives who do not completely understand the dynamics of a coparenting relationship, even if the BM in the equation is a looneybin. And I do realize that some of them are.
If they'd just relax and step back, life would seriously change for them. Trying to dictate from the background, or even the forefront in some of these cases is only adding to the drama.
It's pretty sad actually that they just don't get it. I wonder if I should summons some of the old heads from this site to come back. Maybe they can give these ladies the hand holding they need, but I doubt it. Whining about the BM just wasn't on the menu. LOL.
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Post by truthbtold on Aug 26, 2013 18:18:45 GMT -5
As I SMH, it is coming to light why so many have issues with BMD. Some of this BS is guided by insecure type new GFs and wives who do not completely understand the dynamics of a coparenting relationship, even if the BM in the equation is a looneybin. And I do realize that some of them are.If they'd just relax and step back, life would seriously change for them. Trying to dictate from the background, or even the forefront in some of these cases is only adding to the drama. It's pretty sad actually that they just don't get it. I wonder if I should summons some of the old heads from this site to come back. Maybe they can give these ladies the hand holding they need, but I doubt it. Whining about the BM just wasn't on the menu. LOL. I just want to underscore the underlined. I don't want any confusion for the hard to understand, we have always acknowledged the nuttiness of many of these BMs. I will even go so far as to say it is often overwhelmingly the BM for no reason than the new GF/Wife, but in many instances they play a role as well and often for the reasons you delineated. Also, it is often a matter of just trying to hard as evidenced by many posts here. The constant Facebook mentions, contacting the new women, etc. I don't even understand that. Truthbtold (lol), the man and his child's mother shouldn't be Facebook friends. That's just my opinion. It's really no need, just problems. What's even more glaring is the ratio of male to female posters. It's women in here that do the most complaining of their situations. Now some may argue it's biological thing, the way men and women are wired, but it is still interesting to note. To have read, a few posts up in this thread, a poster mentioning being on antidepressants is just insanity and should never ever happen. When we have inquired as to why the BM has the new GF/Wife's contact information, no response at times. What are we to do? What impressions are we left with? *shrugs* Maybe they can figure it out on their own, after the fact, problem #1. Girl, go summon the OG's LOL |
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Post by jaylady999 on Aug 26, 2013 18:40:59 GMT -5
I am a firm believer in not being able to control anyone's actions but your own. Anyone who can implement this way of thinking throughout every aspect of their life will find much peace.
LOL@OG's. Hilarious!
I see if I can get a couple to fall through here from my FB.
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Post by truthbtold on Aug 26, 2013 19:24:36 GMT -5
I am a firm believer in not being able to control anyone's actions but your own. Anyone who can implement this way of thinking throughout every aspect of their life will find much peace. Word!!! People do get sick from just stress and drama in their lives. No way, I rebuke that. |
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Post by bshaffer12 on Sept 26, 2013 9:34:08 GMT -5
Where have I heard all of this before? *yawn* Oh yeah, this site is full of the same types of posts/comments. If you read the already many redundant threads/posts, you will be provided with some perspectives and insight.
Sorry to post my situation to a site dedicated to baby mama drama. I think it's expected that many stories would be similar.
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Post by truthbtold on Oct 1, 2013 13:09:18 GMT -5
Where have I heard all of this before? *yawn* Oh yeah, this site is full of the same types of posts/comments. If you read the already many redundant threads/posts, you will be provided with some perspectives and insight. Sorry to post my situation to a site dedicated to baby mama drama. I think it's expected that many stories would be similar.Thus, resulting in many similar responses. Thanks for proving my point. |
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Post by SPGFBABYMAMA on Dec 26, 2013 15:39:46 GMT -5
I ABSOLUTELY AGREE WITH THIS ONE! 100% I AM A MOTHER OF TWINS AND I'M INVOLVED WITH A MAN THAT HAS A SON OF HIS OWN. YES HIS BABY MAMA HAS DONE THE TEXT THING, THE COURT THING, THE "YOU CANT SEE YOUR SON IF" COMMENTS, AND ALL THAT BS. YES IT WAS ANNOYING AT THE BEGINNING BECAUSE #1 I'M NOT THAT TYPE OF BABY MAMA AND I DID NT UNDERSTAND WHY SHE WANTED TO PRESENT HERSELF AS SUCH. #2 SHES NOT MY BABY MAMA NOR DO SHE AND I HAVE A CHILD TOGETHER. THEREFORE WE HAVE NOTHING TO DISCUSS OR EVEN COMMUNICATE ABOUT PERIOD, ES SPECIALLY AFTER BEING AS DISRESPECTFUL AS SHE HAS BEEN. I'M DOING WHAT I HAVE TO DO TO PROTECT MY OWN KIDS AND HE HAS TO DO THE SAME. THEIR BUSINESS IS NOT MINE UNLESS IT INVOLVES MY CHILDREN PERIOD. YES IVE MADE A FEW MISTAKES ALONG THE WAY..I DID THE "PLAY NICE" IVE HAD THE "CORDIAL CONVERSATION" (WHICH WAS NOT EVEN NECESSARY) ALTHOUGH I KNEW I GOT UNDER HER SKIN WITH THE TYPE OF WOMAN I PRESENTED MYSELF AS SIMPLY BECAUSE I WAS A WOMAN ABOUT IT(SOMETHING SHE COULD NOT BE) NOW US CONVERSATION PROBABLY SHOULD NT HAVE HAPPENED BUT THAT WAS MY BF FAULT, NOT HERS OR MINE.(LONG STORY) BUT ANYWAYS....AT RANDOM SHE WILL ALWAYS MAKE HER COMMENTS WHEN THINGS ARE NOT GOING RIGHT IN HER LIFE OR THINGS DONT GO THE WAY SHE WANTS THEM TO WITH BD. PERSONALLY IDC AND I WONT LET THAT CONSUME ME OR MY TIME. I BACK SLIDE SOMETIME AND GET REALLY UPSET BUT I LEARNED TO REALISE ITS OUT OF MY PLACE AND MY CONTROL AND THEY JUST HAVE TO DO THEM. MY BF AND I ARE BEST FRIENDS SO HE TELLS ME EVERYTHING...VOLUNTARY AND I'M ALWAYS GONNA LISTEN. ONLY THING HE CAN DO TO HELP THE SITUATION IS GET A PARENTING PLAN WITH HER AND TAKE SOME OF THE POWER SHE HAS DOWN A NOTCH, BUT THIS IS HIS CHOICE. ITS THE BEST WAY TO HANDLE THINGS I SWEAR. BOTTOM LINE IS I LOVE MY BF AND HIS SON AND I KNOW THAT THERE AER 3 SIDES TO EVERY STORY(HIS SIDE,HER SIDE, AND THE TRUTH) THATS IT! SO I WILL NEVER BE NAIVE ENOUGH TO BLAME HER FOR THE BREAK UP OR ANYTHING LIKE THAT, BUT THATS ALSO HIS PAST, WHICH I DONT CARE TO HEAR ABOUT OR EVEN WONDER ABOUT. SHE IS WHO SHE IS AND I CANT CHANGE THAT NOR DO I CARE TO. YES I PRAY SHE GETS HERSELF TOGETHER BEFORE THEIR SON IS OLD ENOUGH TO SEE FOR HIMSELF BUT IF SHE DOESNT...HER CHOICE AND HER BUSINESS. ILL CONTINUE TO STAY IN A WOMAN'S PLACE. MY KIDS HIS SON AND MY MAN ARE THE MOST IMPORTANT THINGS IN MY LIFE, THEREFORE I WILL NEVER ALLOW HER TO RUIN OR TAKE THAT FROM ME. WHILE SHE IS UP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT TEXTING PICS OF HIS SON AND TRYING TO SAY THINGS ABOUT THEIR SON JUST TO MAKE IT SEEM LIKE ITS REALLY ABOUT HIM..I'M PEACEFULLY SLEEPING NEXT TO HIM. SHE HAS NO CLUE AS TO WHAT SHE IS DOING AND WILL SURELY GET IT TOGETHER ONE DAY.............IF ITS NOT TOO LATE. SHES BITTER AND THATS OK...WHAT CAN I DO TO MAKE THINGS EASIER? HA! STAY IN MY OWN d**n LANE AND LET HER DO HER....IS SHE THINKS SHE CAN TAKE HER BD BACK, HEY TRY CUZ IF HE GOES FOR IT YAL DESERVE EACH OTHER ANYWAY. IF SHE THINKS SHE CAN DO THIS OR THAT BETTER THAN ME(AS SHES STATED) YOU MUST CANT IF YOU GOTTA BROADCAST THAT...LOL..SHE REALLY HAS BEEN COMICAL FOR THE PAST YEAR....GROW UP, DEAL WITH IT, OR FIND SOME NEW TRICKS CUZ NOBODY IS EVEN THINKING ABOUT HER NOR HER NEXT MOVE...   |
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Post by swazee on Mar 10, 2014 7:34:53 GMT -5
hi all, i am new in this but i find it very interesting as i relate a lot to it.
i think my problem is that i just cant accept another women take advantage of my husband's kindness.. she is using the baby to get back at him and that just pisses me off as it has affected our relationship badly!!
i really dont know how to accept the fact that she will forevr be part of our lives, please help
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