Court system strikes again

[youknowwhatitis]

The truth obviously hurts because most of you respond in anger when someone tells you the truth for me your insults don't phase me because in the end I know the truth. There will always be a winner and a loser. The loser if a sorry loser will feel bitter it's only natural. My BD is simply bitter because he lost. It is his choice what he does or does not do. I have grown emotionally enough to understand that when people attempt to do things to spite you it's because you've whipped them and it is bred of jealousy. I don't feel the need to spite anyone because I didn't lose anything. Ultimately my child is loved and well taken care of and always will be and that's something to be proud of and celebrate.

[youknowwhatitis]

BD's feel like BM is not their responsibility so in turn isn't it only right for BM to feel like he's not her responsibility. What he has or doesn't have isn't her concern, why should she act out of concern for him but he boasts about not acting out of concern for her. Surely this is not right!

[nomoredrama]

Youknowwhatitis, when a woman makes a decision to get pregnant by going off her birth control pills behind the BDs back, the BD does not DECIDE to have a baby. The woman CHOSE to have a baby. And, as I said, my DH decided to keep the child support the same.

But, why should the man have less so that the lazy, stupid, ignorant, jealous, selfish BM can have more. Yeah, yeah, it is about the child you are going to say. And, I say that is B.S. There is nothing that the BM does that is about the child. It is about her self interest and her desire to get EVEN with my DH. And not just in my DH's situation but in most CBM situations, it is about the BMs self interest!!

You continue to try to justify crazy behavior, but there is no justification for CRAZY!! Crazy is as crazy does!

[youknowwhatitis]

Yes your Dh's BM is coniving and wrong but it is not about HER it is about the kid. Is the kid taken care of? He let her trick him and it's unfortunate but the kid is here and has to be supported nonetheless. God will get her.

Anybody that dont f*ck with me does not because they KNOW they cant f*ck wit me. I make my haters my motivators.

[nomoredrama]

Keia, I hear what you but to me it sounds like you are saying the man should not protect himself. The man should not be a doormat just beause he has a child with a woman. The BM and the BD don't have to like one another, but they should be able to treat each other with respect. A BM is not showing the BD respect by trying to ruin him financially. Essentially, she is saying, "I don't give a darn about you. It is ALL about me." I keep missing the part about it being about the child.

[youknowwhatitis]

What happens is that one parent say's d**n the other one and then it turns into drama because the one parent who doesn't want to cooperate because he or she feels that they can get or keep more if they do it their way then the drama starts. I gave my BD a chance to do the right thing he declined. So he ended up how he is. A man can protect himself by filing cs on himself...I know some men who have done it. Working out an agreement with the BM and having it notarized then it will be legal. Or only having unprotected sex with the woman that he is married to and plans on being or is committed to for the rest of his life. Remember it's HIS future he is protecting. If any of you have boys please teach them this. Reckless will soon have you check-less.

[nomoredrama]

I know there are people who have managed to work out parenting agreement.

A good friend of mine's DH has a parenting agreement with his ex. They never went to court for visitation or child support. In his situation, his ex-wife left the marriage so I don't think she harbored any ill will against him. Remarkably, the two get along...Actually, the four get along. My friend gets along well with her DH's ex and my friend's DH gets along well with his ex-wife's DH. And my friend's DH gets along well with my friend's ex-DH. I mean the type of get along where they have birthday parties together. The kids are happy and well adjusted.

My DH & I tried a parenting agreement with his BM but she doesn't want to agree to anything. All she wants to do is whine about what he doesn't do when she has made it impossible for him to do more than pay child support. Like I said before, she moved out of the continental US, so we can't even pick the child up for visitation anymore. She won't give us her new address, so we can't even mail gifts to my SD. In my DH's case, his BM's RECKLESSNESS has left her daughter almost FATHERLESS...What kind of father can he be to his daughter who doesn't live in the continental US? And, phone calls can only do so much.

[gemmani]

Its easy for the BMs on the board to jump on their high horse and start preaching about the "kids". After leaving court the other day, BM leaves a voicemail for my fiance stating how she wants him back and if he "cooperates" with her, she'll lower the CS. I'm sorry, but that doesn't seem like it's "for the kids". So miss youknowwhatitis, YOUR facts aren't the same for everyone else. It's called EMPATHY stupid, try looking at a situation for another (more intelligent) stand point. You can't defend all BMs, and you can stop pretending like there aren't some truley grimy females out there that don't consider the kids, she just wants her man back. As I said before, get a life.

[youknowwhatitis]

Gemmani.....I stated that FACT in another post. Read ALL the post before you start telling ME or anybody else what to do. For the record you can kiss my ____ fill in the blank.

This is from the female mentality post:

I speak for myself and all BM's like me. Self-sufficient but gon make da*n sure we get what our child is entitled too. They may call that "greed" down south but upstate "it's handling business. Maybe our mentality's just clash. I handle's mine, and anything I get from BD is a help not my means to my whole existence. If BM got enough game to get that much and don't keep the kids that much and he is stupid enough to allow her...what can I do. He made that choice, but most children prefer to be with their mom especially small children. But once they are 13 they should be old enough to choose. There are bad apples in every bunch, race, socioeconomic background etc. But there are a lot of good BM's who handle their business for and about their kids and I WILL ALWAYS REPRESENT THEM. Far more good BM's than good BD's. Most lawyers concur that when BD seeks custody it is 90% to avoid paying cs. I have a complete single mother handbook written by 2 psychologist's and they they are experts and they say the same thing. It was given to me by a public health nurse. Mainstream society is on the mother's side. Matter of fact I will post some excerpts from it.

For the record silly chick she may not even want that man...just doesn't want U to have him.

[destini1969]

Gemmani, you can't reason or logically help a CBM who's having an identity crisis! MOST BMs are bitter because the BDs have moved on with their lives and dont' want to be involved with the CBMs foolishness! They were probably a "jump-off" anyway!

[gemmani]

I'm sorry youknowwhatitis, I get headaches when I argue with dumb people. I thinK "I WANT YOU TO COME HOME AND BE WITH ME" means she wants him back. Stupid.
And I still stand by my statement that your dumb behind refuses to acknowledge the fact that there are triffling females out there who aren't looking out for the kids. I don't care about you and the fact that you're "doing you". Who cares, go get yourself a cookie. But you can't lump all BMs into your category. Stupid.

[gemmani]

And destini, you're right . I love it when people try to justify things that are obviously wrong. Takes a special type of logic...........

[youknowwhatitis]

Destini is clearly off her d*mn rocker and apparently you are too. Learn to read and you would possibly see the truth...... You don't see it because you don't want to see it you would rather argue your weak point. I think your a little too old to be calling people stupid we are not in KINDERGARTEN on the playground honey. There is nothing you are I can do about trifling BM's or BD's so what the hell is your point? You obviously lack game....let me hip your dum azz to something.....she may not want him honey she just wants him to leave you so she can say that she got him from U. Clearly if she really wanted him she would not have filed cs which would only impair their relationship she would buddy up to him and sleep with him behind your back in hopes to woo him away from you. Sometimes people pursue people that they don't really want in their heart just to prove a point. Hence once a woman knows another woman want's a man suddenly she wants him. She didn't want him until she knew someone else did....doesn't really want him in her heart. U can't understand me because your too simple minded. Get ya game up.

*ps if you really lack street skills or the ability to pick up on bs which I suspect you do you are probably going to respond to this by saying something stupid which U think is smart like well if you have so much game why is your situation the way it is....cant educate the simple LOL. But like I said I'm 20 something and I'm smarter than U how old r u honey 45 or ancient like Destini.

[gemmani]

Lol. I'm 20 something just like you. Except I didn't lay down with a man who can't stand me and have a baby. MY situation is that I love a man with 3 kids and a BM who wants to marry me. That's all. I understand you completely sweetie. Its just that your responses are still stupid. I call a spade a spade. Simple as that. MY POINT IS WHY ARE YOU DEFENDING THESE FOOLS? If you agree that they are fools, then what is your issue? My cousin is a single mom and she has a good head on her shoulders. Doesn't pawn the kid off, spends time with him, an all around great mom. She doesn't spend her life complaining about her BD and how he's this, that, and the third. SHe just does what she has to do- unlike you who's soooo mature that she denies her own child access to that child's family and b*tches and whines about it. I know all about what she's doing, believe me. But she's still a bum-b*tch for that and everything she's doing to him. At the end of the day, I have him. And she doesn't.
As to your "intelligence"...........that's subjective.

[destini1969]

Gemmani, don't waste your time trying to explain logic to unbalanced CBM, it's useless. Most people of that nature are prone for destruction; it's a great thing her BD saw through it! Just pray that her son survive and don't become another welfare statistic like his mother!

JunieB you are correct, Keia1 is confused and has been posting as the following: LOL, tellitlikeitreallyis, yellabone2sexy, youwhatitissobringitdestini, youknowwhatitis!