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Post by gemmani on Jul 9, 2009 12:39:08 GMT -5
Not a problem, my dear  We've all been there with that crap. Once your bf gets the hang of dealing with BM, it'll get easier. I'm soooooo not saying that SHE will stop, but once the boundaries are in place, it's easier to ignore the stupidity. |
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Post by jaylady999 on Jul 9, 2009 13:12:23 GMT -5
Not a problem, my dear We've all been there with that crap. Once your bf gets the hang of dealing with BM, it'll get easier. I'm soooooo not saying that SHE will stop, but once the boundaries are in place, it's easier to ignore the stupidity. And at some point, she'll get to the point where she even laughs at BMs stupidity. Thats where I am now  |
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Post by gemmani on Jul 9, 2009 13:20:17 GMT -5
LOL Jay, I'm so there with you! All I do now is shake my head and chuckle.
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Post by denvergirl on Jul 9, 2009 21:22:28 GMT -5
I can not wait for the day when we sit back and laugh.  |
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Post by hunter on Jul 9, 2009 22:29:43 GMT -5
Are you kidding me Hunter? If he didn't want to be with her, then that's what it is. They were together several years. A baby can't fix things that are broken........did you get that memo yet? I guess I was a bad person too. I started dating my husband when his kids were 4, 2, and 9 months. The relationship was BROKEN. Done. Finito. Completely over. Nothing left to "work out" with his "young family". Don't go judging this girl. Her bf was smart enough to realize that it was over and didn't stay there trying to beat a dead horse.....maybe you should go by his example. 1) Do not fault me for trying to provide a family for my daughter. Relationships are not perfect and take work and unlike the men most of the women on this forum seem to be involved with –at least I TRIED to make my relationship work. 2) My daughter was not a "fix". Her mother and I were in love and we both wanted a baby. Her mother and I still love her very much and we both tried for years to give our daughter a family. 3) I don't know you well enough to say whether or not you are a bad person, but I do not agree with your decision to date a man with 3 young children -a man with priorities other than you. |
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Post by hunter on Jul 9, 2009 22:30:48 GMT -5
And by the way Hunter, um, I met my Dh when my SS was barely a year old, it happens, its call life. No, it is called an excuse. When a man has a young child with a woman, it is a huge responsibility and he needs to be allotted the time and opportunity to work things out with the woman who bore him that child. I think it is very sad that any woman would want to be with a man who has a young family, knowing that his commitments and priorities lie elsewhere; and I can only conclude that such a woman is utterly and completely devoid of any moral upbringing to even consider wrecking apart the family of an innocent child. |
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Post by hunter on Jul 9, 2009 22:31:58 GMT -5
First I would like to address Hunter. One- I don't think you have enough facts to understand why this man left her. And Two, I don't remember asking an opinion on if I was in the right relationship with this guy or not. 1) The man left his TWO-YEAR-OLD child –what additional facts do you require? The only FACT that is relevant here is that he left his newborn child and the mother of his newborn child to be with another woman. Any rational, moralistic person with the tiniest shred of decency can insinuate that this is not a good man. 2) You posted on this forum and conveyed your feelings about the situation that you are currently in, and that situation is a direct, unaffected, consequence of your relationship, therefore, although you may not have explicitly requested input about your relationship –the inference existed for that input to be put forward. |
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Post by hunter on Jul 9, 2009 22:46:43 GMT -5
Perhaps the American value system that was instilled in me in the trailor park is outdated but a man ought not shirk from his responsibilities and fatherhood is the greatest of all responsibilities a man undertakes in his lifetime so I find it extremely disheartening to live through the decay of all that which was once a part of American righteousness and Americana.
A woman that bears your child, is a woman that has the right to be in your life and expect to be taken care of and provided for since a child is the greatest, most cherished gift, a woman can give to a man.
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Post by gemmani on Jul 10, 2009 6:48:29 GMT -5
You know what hunter? You are really stepping out of line here. All of a sudden we have no morals?  ? I've never kept my DH from handling his responsibilities, hell I HELP HIM. You have absolutely no right to come up in here and judge anyone, especially considering YOUR F*cked up situation. Just because you want to be Captain Save-A-Ho doesn't make you this decent american. Actually, it makes you an IDIOT. You were an IDIOT for having a baby with straight TRASH. A LOSER who won't even go and fight for his child who he "loves so much". You talk so much crap it's ridiculous. Wake the hell up! It's 2009, not 1949. No one told these "poor women" to get knocked up with no husband!!!! Did that thought ever go through your little pea-brain? ? You're willing to wife up a straight TRAMP, and got the nerve to talk about others. A tramp who is knocked up by 2 different people and NO RING. How about THEM apples? You are no longer welcome here in my book. |
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Post by jaylady999 on Jul 10, 2009 7:03:13 GMT -5
No, it is called an excuse. When a man has a young child with a woman, it is a huge responsibility and he needs to be allotted the time and opportunity to work things out with the woman who bore him that child.
WOW. And thus why you are in this forum whining about a woman WHO.CLEARLY.DOES.NOT.WANT.YOU. Sorry, but my DHs responsibilities end with his children, end of story. There is no room for BM in his life, he owes her jack.
I think it is very sad that any woman would want to be with a man who has a young family, knowing that his commitments and priorities lie elsewhere; and I can only conclude that such a woman is utterly and completely devoid of any moral upbringing to even consider wrecking apart the family of an innocent child.
Again, says the man who is pining after a woman who clearly does not want you. LOL
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Post by jaylady999 on Jul 10, 2009 7:06:31 GMT -5
You posted on this forum and conveyed your feelings about the situation that you are currently in, and that situation is a direct, unaffected, consequence of your relationship, therefore, although you may not have explicitly requested input about your relationship –the inference existed for that input to be put forward.
If this isnt the case of the black pot calling the kettle, I dont know what is. YOu are conveying your feelings about the situationyou are currently in just as well, which obviously is not working for you. Yet here you are 'judging' someone else? Are you kidding me? Her sitch(the original poster) is way more realistic than yours 100 grand. You are apparently trying to make a family with a jailbird and wh0re(your words, not mine) who is pregnant by someone else. Really, you have not all that much room to vocalize your opinions of her sitch, sorry
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Post by jaylady999 on Jul 10, 2009 7:07:12 GMT -5
A woman that bears your child, is a woman that has the right to be in your life and expect to be taken care of and provided for since a child is the greatest, most cherished gift, a woman can give to a man. Too bad your BM doesnt feel the same way  |
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Post by jaylady999 on Jul 10, 2009 7:08:35 GMT -5
You know what hunter? You are really stepping out of line here. All of a sudden we have no morals? ? I've never kept my DH from handling his responsibilities, hell I HELP HIM. You have absolutely no right to come up in here and judge anyone, especially considering YOUR F*cked up situation. Just because you want to be Captain Save-A-Ho doesn't make you this decent american. Actually, it makes you an IDIOT. You were an IDIOT for having a baby with straight TRASH. A LOSER who won't even go and fight for his child who he "loves so much". You talk so much crap it's ridiculous. Wake the hell up! It's 2009, not 1949. No one told these "poor women" to get knocked up with no husband!!!! Did that thought ever go through your little pea-brain? ? You're willing to wife up a straight TRAMP, and got the nerve to talk about others. A tramp who is knocked up by 2 different people and NO RING. How about THEM apples? You are no longer welcome here in my book. Dammit Gem, I shoulda just kept my mouth shut and kept reading before I posted. Woulda saved me some keystrokes LOL |
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Post by gemmani on Jul 10, 2009 7:09:28 GMT -5
This man has no sense. How dare he come and judge others like he's so perfect? Why didn't he wife up the S L U T when she got pregnant? Since he's sooo noble and such. He has NO room to throw stones, his glass house is already pretty cracked and broken. I'm so done with this person.
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Post by denvergirl on Jul 10, 2009 12:37:14 GMT -5
Hunter all I have to say to you is I feel sorry for you and your daughter. From the sounds of it, she is the one suffering. You care so much about your daughter then fight for her and take on the single parent life since you know all and are the super hero.
Instead of barking down my tree for things that aren't of your concern and trying to make everyone one look like the bad guy or feel sorry for you, worry about how screwed up your situation is. At least you make it seem like your the one picking up all the pieces. Ever think my man got tired of picking up the pieces?
A relationship is hard work. Just because you have a child doesn't mean staying together is the best thing to do. All they did was scream at each other. Do you think that is how he wants his son to remember his mom and dad? What values and morals are you teaching your daughter about her siblings skin color? I wouldn't want my child raised by a man who can't look passed color. You preach about a man taking care of the women who bore his child... where the hell are you and the mother of your baby?
And and by the way he didn't leave her for me. Who the hell said that? Stop trying to make me look like the bad girl who took a daddy away from the child. He left her long before we ever concerned dating. Why don't you look at your situation... you're leaving your child with a mother who neglects her responsibilities as a mother and you as a father have failed your child by not keeping her safe.
I think you and the mother both need therapy. Is this about your daughters well being or the fact the mother clearly doesn't want a life with you?
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We've all been there with that crap. Once your bf gets the hang of dealing with BM, it'll get easier. I'm soooooo not saying that SHE will stop, but once the boundaries are in place, it's easier to ignore the stupidity.
? I've never kept my DH from handling his responsibilities, hell I HELP HIM. You have absolutely no right to come up in here and judge anyone, especially considering YOUR F*cked up situation. Just because you want to be Captain Save-A-Ho doesn't make you this decent american. Actually, it makes you an IDIOT. You were an IDIOT for having a baby with straight TRASH. A LOSER who won't even go and fight for his child who he "loves so much". You talk so much crap it's ridiculous. 