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Post by memyslfni on May 25, 2008 20:23:17 GMT -5
What a memorial weekend! Today I told my dh to tell his bm to do US a favor and jump off a cliff...I'll be watching the news tonite! Ha Ha!  |
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Post by destini1969 on May 25, 2008 20:25:28 GMT -5
LMBO.. So that's another meaning for JUMP OFF! |
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Post by memyslfni on May 25, 2008 20:25:52 GMT -5
WHO LET THE MONKEYS OUT THE CAGE?  CUZ I JUST SAW ONE JUMP OFF A CLIFF! ;D |
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Post by memyslfni on May 25, 2008 20:30:30 GMT -5
I've learned to laugh off anything that has to do with BM's. Because thats all they are A "Joke". And all that matters in the end is I'm right and She looks like the Fool she is...  |
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Post by nomoredrama on May 25, 2008 21:07:25 GMT -5
memyselfni, the better choice of words should have been "if they get someone else in their lives." I have learned that women who are too much into the drama rarely get men in their lives...Well, good men that stick around anyway. Too much bitterness can poison you.
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Post by awsomalx on May 26, 2008 1:16:54 GMT -5
Keia1,LOL, Youknow or whomever you choose to be from one unstable moment to the next. I'm going to reply to your rant below with statements you've made on this board (you really are Bipolar as your mood swing postings show) From awsomalx post he stated " most likely till they are grown will he be a paycheck dad." How pitiful!!!!!!!! You're judging me based on what? it can't be that you KNOW ME. You've never met me nor have you ever spoken to me. So that means that you're judging me based on postings. Hmmmm, that goes against what you typed here for the record it impossible to judge a person based off posts alone. So if you're judging my character based off a post.....it applies to you as well. So does this only apply to you or is this a universal thought that applies for everyone? Hell if that one doesn't apply for you, then maybe this one that you used does This world is so full of critical, judgemental people but sometimes if people just try to understand how other feels or why, they don't have to agree But naahhh, that one only applies to others as well I guess. Or maybe it doesn't fit this conversation. So i'll let those two slide and we'll consider this one the thought that you may want to heed (after all you typed it ) you are hurt by my statement and attempting to hurt me back.. if you do not agree that is fine...but that doesn't give you the right to attack ME because you disagree. Once again....don't take it personally. Boy, you are just a beacon of wisdom aren't you So if I'm comprehending this correctly, I'm a bad guy because I choose to step back and avoid the CBM?? Hmmph, goes against the advise you espoused here Take heart knowing that YOU have done the right thing and know that is not your fault or DH's fault if SD doesn't have the things she needs. "I know it's hard to take a back when someone is so terribly wrong and causing the child harm but I would just chill out on it". [/b] [/quote] So it's only okay when keia1 says it's okay?? Oh how grandeur is the keia1, bow to her to omnipotence! Whew, you really shouldn't of went there as you are one of the biggest offenders of that very thing! Heck, you have championed the cause of trying to control your BD and his access to the child. Oh, you've forgotten about those post, well here let's refresh your memory a bit: I would still let him get him (as long as support was paid I know people don't agree with that but you make em you support em) or you don't get to enjoy em. That's my philosophy it may be a bit tainted but .... So as long as he's sending you that $9k a year, he can come visit YOU and the possible see the child. It's all about the dollar obviously. And I say visit YOU because you typed this Whatever the case I won't allow BD to take him away from my presence.
BD is the villain Meanwhile my son is well taken care of, in daycare and doing just fine.
So until they apologize and show some interest on their own behalf he will continue not to see them and I don't believe he's missing out on anything. I'd rather him be only loved by us (my fam) Yeah, you are such the righteous one aren't you, LOL And according to this little gem, BM's can and do control it ALL........So does a bM HAVE A bd..........SHE CONTROLS HOW MUCH MONEY YOU CAN MAKE......AS SHE GETS A PERCENTAGE........SHE CONTROLS HOW OFTEN YOU SEE YOUR KID.........OR IF YOU SEE HIM OR HER AT ALL.................SHE CONTROLS IT... But you say it's the boy that is running away from the Woman (woman, that's not what I'd call you in person  ) Weak Men huh, this coming from the cowardly broad that when mad at BD's Sister, the great keia1 does I left a nasty comment, made me feel much better I left it anymously.... Hope I'm not CBM for that but oh well. But I guess that's the Womanly way to express discord  No I guess that wasn't good enough so you being the vengeful coward that you are decide to use the child (like every other CBM) So I felt like if that's the way she really feels about me she need not enjoy the priviledges of spending time with my son. Since she seems to think I don't need to feel obligated to check on BD. To this day she hasn't seen him. Tries to put on that front like she doesn't care but I know she does she only has 1 brother and he only has 1 son. Her mom hasn't seen him either only BD. If you represent what a "Woman" is or shall I say has become (because I come from a family of REAL WOMEN) It's the End of Times! Maybe you should follow this thought pattern you were on. Because you still exhibit much anger (and resentment) even with the $9k a year the BD pays you I'm very still mad about that. In the end I got what I wanted...my son and some of BD's money Maybe I need to find and anger or angry people support group as well. |
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Post by lovejones08 on May 26, 2008 9:23:29 GMT -5
you are too much awsom.....I was going to comment; but I will just leave this alone..lol enough was said.... |
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Post by youknowwhatitis on May 26, 2008 11:36:43 GMT -5
The truth hurts doesn't it. The truth hurt you so bad you attempt to make someone look bad who isn't even who or what you think. Didn't work...you are STILL A WEAK MAN WHO RATHER THAN TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR SITUATION THAT HE CREATED WOULD RATHER ATTEMPT TO DIVERT THE NEGATIVE ATTENTION HE HAS ATTRACTED TO HIMSELF. "You called your babies ward's of the state. No honey....they are your children and YOU have an OBLIGATION TO THEM that you obviously are shirking and in a sickening way ATTEMPTING TO JUSTIFY. Bipolar people can tell the truth and ......U AIN'T SH*T. I'm not judging your character I'm judging your INACTION TOWARD YOUR CHILDREN. Then want to blame the BM is your BM your MOM controlling YOU I thought U were GROWN. "Trying to justify why it's necessary to turn your child into a ward of the state is dumb founding to me. Child support is rarely about support of/for the child. " Your words. Yes it is about support of the child which you created and have an obligation to. Can't stand the fact that you have a financial obligation to your own offspring. The money is going to support your children' s LIFE AND WELLBEING. Which we all know is no concern to you JUST YOUR OWN from that weak a*s psychological defense mechanism you attempted to USE. Let me clarify something for you...I"m talking about U not Keia1, or anybody else. Judging and telling the truth are two totally different things. When is the last time you have went to pick your kid or kids up and let them spend the day with u. (If I"m right about u which I know that I am you are going to respond to this by attempting to attack me personally not answering the question. Have you ever considered Destini may be glad your kids are out of your life. Of course she'd never act that way or say to your face. Or maybe I could be wrong but if I know women and I do....I'll bet I"m right. "So in essence, as the BD ordered to pay CS, I'm providing ALL the support and putting supplementing her lifestyle (that she couldn't afford if she didn't have a child by me that the State now wards over). The CS laws are where a lot of the drama comes from. It gives a possibly unstable CP a bully pulpit to harass and demean the NCP without the same backing. It causes the NCP to be bitter (because the system can make you feel helpless and hopeless (really emasculating). Your words again.Why are you paying support if you did what you were supposed to do as a father you wouldn't be on papers or maybe it was the result of a divorce. Or maybe your opinion of helping out is doing a little as you possibly can....BINGO. Unfortunately the USA does not agree. It's not about U it's about your children the problem is that it's all about you...you strike me as arrogant mad because BM cut you down to size so now you take it out on your poor children who had nothing to do with this mess. You made them you must financially and emotionally support them anything LESS is cheating your child. You'll trade in your child's well being for your own peace of mind. YOU ARE CRAZY if you expect me or anyone with a half of a brain to buy that. YOU ARE SIMPLY RESENTFUL OF THE RESPONSIBILITY YOUR DECISIONS COST YOU. ONLY WEAK MEN BLAME WOMEN FOR THEIR PROBLEM. REAL IS AS REAL DOES. YOU DON'T LOVE THOSE KIDS OR YOU WOULDN'T BE BITTER. A quote from a good male friend of mine, " if your upset about having to take responsibility for your kids you didn't really want them in the first place. AT THAT IS REST MY CASE. VERDICT: SELFISH DEADBEAT DAD ATTEMPTING TO JUSTIFY HIS LESS THAN NOBLE BEHAVIOR!!! BULLLS*IT!!-ps...didn't know you were a psychiatrist....LOL |
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Post by youknowwhatitis on May 26, 2008 11:44:28 GMT -5
IT'S OBVIOUS THAT YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH. BECAUSE YOU ARE WEAK. IT IS A WEAK PERSON WHO ATTEMPTS TO USE PUTDOWNS THAT DON'T WORK TO ATTEMPT TO MAKE HIS WEAK SELF FEEL BETTER. OBVIOUSLY I AM A MUCH BETTER PARENT THAN U. I'M JUST TRYING TO GIVE YOUR WEAK A*S SOME STRENGTH. I HANDLES MINE AND IN THE END I AM VICTORIOUS YOU ARE SAD AND BITTER. JUST KEEP PAYING AND HOPE THOSE 18 YEARS PASS BY REAL FAST. LOL.......MAD CUZ BM GOT THAT AZZ
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Post by alissa on May 26, 2008 11:54:09 GMT -5
i not sure what this drama is about but you are taking out your resentment on your children it not hurting their mom. The other girl is mad and resentful of the family she is not taking it out on her child. There is a difference you know.
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Post by goddess on May 26, 2008 12:13:34 GMT -5
I think TLC put it best, " if ya got a shorty that you don't show love" you are a scrub.
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Post by destini1969 on May 26, 2008 12:32:24 GMT -5
Hey Alissa, the drama is really about a CBM (Keia1/Youknowwhatitis) trying anything possible to be heard /understood in her misguided existence she calls life!
She uses her child as a supplement to her income and doesn't understand nor care about the emotional harm she is causing her child. She is extremely angry because she is an afterthought, a reject and basically does not exist according to her BD. She is a misguided, poverty stricken soul that thinks 700/month is a lot of money. My heart truly goes out to her bastard child conceived out of wedlock because with her guidance he will grow up just as confused and misguided as his mother.
Her child's only hope is for someone to intervene and pray for him.
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Post by nomoredrama on May 26, 2008 12:39:25 GMT -5
None of us know Awsomlax's situation, so none of us have a right to judge. I share my views based on my perspective (my childhood and my DH's experience). That's all any of us can truly speak about (our own personal experiences). I understand some of what Awsomlax speaks about. The BM could have physically attacked him or was verbally abusive to him. The BM could have played little games involving the children (and we all know the games some women play). She could have had him arrested. Depending on the circumstances, sometimes a man has to walk away to keep the peace. He is providing his viewpoint based on his experience. No one who posts here really knows his exact reasoning behind his decision to walk away. I am not saying that I agree with his decision, but I understand that there are circumstances that may warrant it.
As far as why he pays child support...Some women don't give the man a chance to do right. Some women use the child support system as a weapon. In my DH's case, 2 weeks after his daughter was born, his BM was at the child support enforcement office and also filed for full custody. She turned the situation ugly when it did not need to be. Although he did not want to be in a relationship with his BM, he started buying diapers, clothes, bottles, etc. before the child was born. He did the right thing and went with the BM to her doctors appts. I guess that she thought that he would run back to her after the baby was born. When he told her that he did not love her and would not be in a relationship with her, the BM decided to turn it into a pissing match. And, the BM used the legal system to further her pissing match.
Yes, I do feel that child support, whether court ordered or not, should be paid in support of the child. Some women have learned to use child support as a weapon or as a bargaining chip. That is WRONG, WRONG, WRONG!! That is when child support ceases to be about the child and more about the women trying to get even or trying to get something she mistakenly believes she is "entitled" to.
It was never about the child for the BM. It was about her. And, because she could not have him, she did not want him to have a relationship with his child. But, he jumped thru her legal hoop. He paid his child support. He was granted visitation with his child, yet still, it was not ENOUGH for her. She wanted to make him miserable (because misery loves company).
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Post by alissa on May 26, 2008 12:44:04 GMT -5
God's blessings come great and small. Some mother's receive nothing for their children. Getting $700.00 a month is better than nothing and enough to meet the childs needs.
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Post by alissa on May 26, 2008 12:54:47 GMT -5
tellit I understand your predicament with the BM. I see both sides. He wanted to do the right which is great. But from her perspective she was more annoyed and upset that he used her for sex, got her pregnant and doesn't even love her. She probably felt used and played so she decided to cut losses. Why allow him to use her and discard her and she get's nothing out of it but a baby. I'm sure she loves her child just didn't like the way the chips fell. From his manly perspective he felt he was doing the right thing, not leading her on, and manning up and taking responsibility for his child. They are both right and both wrong. They just had two different expectations for the situation and two different perspectives. Perhaps today those two different perspectives are still playing out. Maybe she wasn't really trying to harm him but to salvage herself and her dignity. Maybe he wasn't really trying to hurt her but just realized after is was all over and done that she really just wasn't the one for him. Perhaps if the could understand each other's points of view they could stop the drama. I'm not saying they both went about it in the right ways but I see where there was room for miscommunication and hurt feelings on both ends.
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CUZ I JUST SAW ONE JUMP OFF A CLIFF! ;D
)
No I guess that wasn't good enough so you being the vengeful coward that you are decide to use the child (like every other CBM)